Radioake ™

Friday night we went to see Jude at the Aladdin Theatre in Portland. Big night out for the folks!! I don't go to a lot of concerts. The biggest concert I ever remember attending was in 1976 in Cincinnati Ohio to hear the Allman Brothers! I went with a guy I was dating who was seriously into drugs…and we stopped at a friend's house before the concert. The wife of his friend (whose nickname was HOOVER because she snorted cocaine so fast) and her husband accompanied us to the concert. I was miserable. We were at the top of the coliseum (or whatever the building was) in Cincinnati and everyone and I mean EVERYONE around me was seriously high. Except me. Didn't do drugs. Did drink a bit though. Wasn't a big Allman Bros. fan….but I digress.

Friday night's concert was nothing like that. Jude was great – I won tickets on KINK radio….I love winning things! We had a lovely dinner before the concert and sat and listened to this guy. But the audience was rude. Shouting out his songs just to be heard. "Asshole!" someone shouted. Turns out that was one of the songs!! They weren't heckling him but it got on our nerves. We listened to him for about an hour. People were singing along (they knew the words….) I was just listening. And I realized something about the way people sing.

They're always better when they're singing along. Karaoke is not easy. I've watched a lot of people try it. I did see a staid Japanese businessman in Tokyo get up to do karaoke in a tempura house turn into Elvis right before my eyes…..maybe it was the Sapporo beer but he was fabulous!! Except for that moment in the 1980's in Tokyo, not so pretty. But so many of us can sing like professionals along with the radio or a live performer! I'm one of them! I'm a fabulous singer….with the radio blaring. I'm seriously (not) surprised I'm not asked to sing in a band.

When John and I were first dating, I'd sing every song on the radio. Every one. Really. Still do. Little harder to hum along on NPR… I can hear a song maybe once and know the lyrics. It's a gift, kind of useless except that it amuses me. John and I had been together for a few months and I was crooning along with Bette Midler singing "The Rose". He turned to me and said, "you have a great voice." No one had ever said that. I fell a little more in love with him in that very moment.

Dead Rita in fact told me my voice wasn't so hot. Not being unkind. Just being Dead Rita – there's a great chapter in the book called "You're Flat" about the issue of my singing. And who do you know that loves you enough to tell you when you're flat in life….and when you're not.

Anyway, I realized Friday night I'm not a great karaoke singer but I'm a great RADIOAKE™ singer! My new word! I invented it! No such word for people who sing along with the radio! What do I do with this great invention??! Not a darn thing. But it's notable! Let me know if I didn't invent it…! And if you now know you can proudly call yourself a radioake™ singer, break a leg!